06/30/2005 - 4:44 p.m.

It's amazing. I'm feeling so much better as of late that it's almost scary. I've been totally unmedicated for almost 2 weeks, battled severe depression and and now more or less coming up on a major upswing of sorts. I'm so hyper that I'm literally bouncing around in my seat and drinking caffiene to no end.

And as I look at the date on the calendar I realize that tomorrow is going to be July 1st and soon it will be the 6th and that will mean that I will have been at this job for one year. I've already lived in my apartment for over a year and I must say that I'm quite proud of myself for managing this major accomplishment despite all of the setbacks of the past 12 months or so.

Quite honestly a lot of things have happened that I never would have thought possible in just the last 5 months or so.

Think about it. For those of you who are keeping score, did you ever think that I would change my ways? Did you ever think that I could allow myself to trust someone? Did you ever think that I would give my heart unquestionably to someone? Did you ever think that you would ever hear me say that YES I am in love?

I never did.

As a matter of fact I was going out of my way to avoid it.

But when I realized it, BOOM. It was the world's greatest feeling.

And lemme tell ya, I'm feeling pretty good right now for whatever reason. I'm not going to question it I'm just going to go with it.

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