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Nothing to see here

10/26/2004 - 2:04 a.m.

This is a blank entry. I started it and then forgot what I was going to say. Nothing to see here folks...move along.

There should be a time limit on how long it takes for karma to come back and bite you on the ass.

Remember how last year I did something and it hurt J really bad? And I never understood WHY he got so upset over it?

I think NOW,

*no I don't think, I KNOW*
I DO understand. And it hurts like hell. No one has done anything bad. No one has done anything wrong. I don't have a say in this anyway. I never did. I knew the rules. I fucking knew them...and accepted them...God damn it!
*lights a ciggie*
I KNEW THE FUCKING RULES!!!!!
*lights another ciggie*
Yet...the whole 'stake through the heart' analogy he made that night makes perfect sense to me now.

*note to someone regarding you know what*Also, the reason I'm considering, thinking about, whatever, not coming up there has very little if anything to do with the above. It has to do with my own inability to say what I need(want?) to say, because it's stupid, pointless and it would serve no useful purpose what so ever in opening my mouth. And my fear is that when I got there, I probably WOULD open my mouth, say the 'stupid pointless and would serve no useful purpose whatsoever' things and just make a big mess and end up losing a friend.

But I think I just did anyway.

FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCCCCCCKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

lights another ciggie and pops open a diet coke

I don't expect you to understand that whole jumbled statement though, because I barely understand it myself.

Reason #43247916234531452349580888 to just keep my fat, goddamn,motherfucking,good for nothing mouth shut

*lights another ciggie*


See, history really DOES repeat itself.

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