08/02/2006 - 10:33 a.m.

Well I know that I am seriously starting to suck at this updating thing which is really sad because this diary used to be my life. I do still write but I usually use the MySpace blog thingy instead.

Quite a bit has been going on in the past few weeks so just bear with me while I write it all out ok?

After I got back from NY (I came back the day after they let me leave the looney bin) I quit taking my meds again because I felt that seven different ones was nothing more than overkill. Well, you know what happens when Miss M stops her meds...

She starts drinking, she sleeps around, she just does things that she normally wouldn't do under regular circumstances. Some of which I've described here.

Chris just asked me how it is possible for me to get into so much trouble(I just described the last WEEK for him) and I told him 'dumb luck I suppose'

But it's not really dumb luck I guess, I just made some VERY bad choices and right now I'm considering myself lucky that I haven't been arrested or anything. Although...I should have been if I'd been caught.

The last week has been one HELL of a roller coaster ride. Started out fairly well but just went downhill after that...started out with a drunken binge with my friend Janett. Quarter draft night...does this sound familiar...anyway...I left after having about...10...KNOWING I was in NO condition to drive and as I was pulling out of the bar I hit a brick wall with my car...just scraped a little paint off the bumper but...So I immediately had a panic attack...went to another bar, called my friend Tony to come get me...I was SO embarrassed. That is the FIRST time he has EVER seen me drunk. Hopefully it'll be the last.

So he takes me to his house and I pass out sitting up on his loveseat. Get up the next morning and he takes me to my car...

I start to drive to work and realize that my tire is flat. I stop, put air in it and notice there is a stab mark in the sidewall...

I made an enemy a few weeks ago and I think he slashed my tire. NOT HAPPY.

So I replace the tire with my spare.

The next day I go to work at Labor Ready..all is going well until 5 minutes before we leave the job site. We were moving a steel fire escape ladder and the guys lost their grip and it lands right on my right hand and wrist. Lost a few days work. 3 hours and 6 x-rays later I'm informed that it's not broken. WELL DUH.

Got the clearance to go back to work yesterday.

Quit my job at the flea market because my boss there gave me a 'mental 20 questions' test and he WASN'T joking...something about me acting like I'm from Mars half the time.

NOT HAPPY.

Finally got my tongue pierced 2 weeks ago...it's awesome! And I have yet to um...'test drive' the thing...but there's someone I have in mind *winks*

Yes this is the GOOD part of the past few weeks.

I met a guy who is totally sweet and awesome and actually likes me in SPITE of everything that I have done in my past and DOES NOT hold it over my head UNLIKE someone (David) did. And trust me if David knew HALF the shit I've done this month he'd have enough ammo for a lifetime and a half of giving me misery which is why I'm SO glad he seems to have disappeared off the face of the earth. Heh you know, I looked at his pics the other day and felt absolutely NOTHING? The way I see it, if he was going to treat me the way he ended up treating me in the end..Fuck Him...May he make someone ELSE miserable. Not me.

Anyway, this guy is like absolutely NO ONE I've EVER met before. He's a total doll. He's 36(will be 37 next month and I'm already planning something special for his b-day), HAS A JOB, OWNS HIS OWN HOME, and has 4 kids and is divorced. He's also got a degree in I believe he said psychology so he can deal with my screwy head too*lol* Anyway, G is the most awesome man I've ever met and given enough time I think I could fall in love...if I haven't already...

Yup, he's definitely the 8th world wonder in my book.

Spent Saturday night in the ER, had a moment of clarity, but the next thing I know I'm in handcuffs being driven to Nashville...had to convince the doc there not to commit me...promised the moon...

Anyway..that's my week in a nutshell...how about yours?

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